Memo to ICANN

The wonderful thing about tigger's
Tigger's a wonderful thing
The top's made out of rubber
The bottom's made out of string
A bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy fun fun fun fun fun!!!
The wonderful thing about tigger is
I'm the only one,
I'm the only one!

Osama bin Laden for CEO of ICANN

ICANN released the transcripts today from the public and board consultations on RegisterFly. Also, they have put out a FAQ.

In response to ICANN's incompetence, I am going to give you 6 reasons why Osama bin Laden should be CEO of ICANN.

6. We know he's a terrorist. ICANN pretends they're not, but yet they are still unable to do the job the Dept of Commerce has mandated them to do.

5. He gets the job done. ICANN couldn't even manage to pull RegisterFly's accreditation on time.

4. He was trained by the CIA. I think Paul Levins and Mike Zupke were probably trained by Penn and Teller. Or maybe not. I doubt Penn and Teller would ever train those lousy guys. That's a step down for them.

3. The US still hasn't caught bin Laden. ICANN hasn't caught RegisterFly.

2. Osama bin Laden is about 50 years old. ICANN is about... 8 years old. Why let a child do things when we can have a pro.

1. The the #1 reason Osama bin Laden should be CEO of ICANN: At least he won't do any worse than they've already done. Sure he may want to blow a few things up, but at least with him, we know where we stand.

Now, for a note. This was meant as satyre. That said, I'm partially serious. If ICANN is incapable of doing their job, it's time for them to either be disbanded, or new leadership and tossing out Vint Cerf is desperaterly needed.

Please help bring some sanity back to ICANN.

ICANN files for chapter 11

ICANN today stated at a news conference that they have filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. RegisterFly started proceedings this past week, as reported here on Green Joe, that involved taking ICANN to arbitration over losing accreditation. This delays the inevitable by at least 30 days.

Paul Levins, one of ICANN's Vice Presidents told the media:

"We are under intense pressure and scrutiny. The lawsuit against RegisterFly and by RegisterFly's customers has lead us into a situation where we are deep into the red."

Levins went on to say that any remaining assets from ICANN following liquidation would be donated to PBS and President Bush's Iraq deployment plan. Levins said that following ICANN's bankrupcy, he and fellow employee Mike Zupke plan to take a long vacation.